blog post by KELLY42105

Today was such a blessing. Since today was my day to work only until noon, I got off work, ran and picked up my co-workers birthday cake and came back to surprise her at work today since we found out she wont be at work tomorrow on her birthday, ate some cate and chatted with my co-workers. Then headed home, let my pups sit outside with me in the sun for a little while but let them back inside before they got too hot and I was able to relax outside in the sun here in Illinois it was in the 80's. I got about an hour of sun and feel soooo much better. I'm really not a winter person. I sat around and relaxed and will start making dinner soon. I'm finding though that there is a lot of judgment out there...so for anyone who is pregnant or trying to become pregnant. I just hope that you all are not too discouraged by some of the things people say. Thankfully I have been able to laugh most everything off or take what I can out of what they say that might be useful. I always get the people that tell me how horrible their pregnancies were and instead of saying that I am lucky to have a relatively enjoyable pregnancy they tell me that I will feel miserable soon, just to wait, etc. I get that they may think they are trying to help but my feet swell already, I get migraines in which I am not allowed to take my prescribed migraine medication becuase it is a class C restristed during pregnancy, my back does hurt, I am super tired and take naps after work, and my fibromyalgia has been flaring up quite a bit, and the newest thing has been when laying down in bed at night I get some serious heartburn and even have some lovely acid reflux I guess you would call it BUT overall I dont really like to talk about all those things....I expected them and knew they came with the territory. I truly dont mind people describing what they went through and how it was in deed tough and a struggle at times becuase it is BUT again I do mind when they act as though I should feel bad for not jumping right in and complaining. I have found a lot of people are willing to share the bad to try and prepare you but arent so willing to keep it equal and describe some of the good that can come from pregnancy. I just hope that everyone knows that each pregnancy is different, every woman, every baby is different, some may be utterly miserable 24/7 while others not so much or only at certain times. I just hope everyone is able to enjoy different things out of their pregnancies and be happy for others to are able to do so while also being sympathetic to those that have very hard pregnancies as well. We should all be a bit more understanding to one another I think. We should be there for eachother when we want to rant and rave and just dont feel well but we should also encourage one another as well. Though through it all I have gotten some great advice and overall enjoy hearing about everyone's experiences. Now that I am showing it sure does insight people to start sharing their stories...which can be pretty cool to hear :) Now if I could just get some of the people in my family and some of the people in Ryan's family to understand the concept of being understanding. I get that my mother in law is a terrible pain, she really is...she is selfish and at times can be downright mean and hurtful not only to Ryan, his sister, her husband, and I and the rest of her family (parents, siblings, etc) but I have tried to tell my mom and sister even though they want to help being mean to her will not help the situation, there was talk that if she caused trouble at the baby shower, she would be told to leave or they would inform her they would call the local sheriff dept and have her removed. Just today my sister informed me that she wanted to know if it was rude to tell Krista (Ryan's sister) to tell my MIL not to come and help set up since she hasnt bothered to call Ryan or I in the past year even after finding out we were pregnant. I get it but I told her yes, not only would it be rude, it would also cause problems for Krista who desperately wants a relationship with her mom and would be put in the middle, but it would also cause a problem for Ryan and I becuase we would be the one's answering to my MIL and he has been attempting to be decent to her as well. My MIL and I have talked and i told her that there are always going to be things that she and I or that she and Ryan or she and her other family members disagree on but that doesnt mean we should love and respect one another and we should not send nasty notes in the mail to eachother stating things that people did over 4 years ago. (she sent Ryan and his sister both a letter in the mail one day about how they were not good kids to her, she said that Ryan didnt talk to her enough when we were over at her house, and just some other stuff that was random) I just told her that really hurt Ryan and Krista and that since they have talked it out, I think it would be best for her to in the future just go directly to them and talk it out. My husband and I really will never leave Kailey alone with my MIL due to the fact that she is in some things that we are not into. She has strangers over at her house quite often from out of state and has meetings with them and has even started hanging out with a christian "healer" who thinks that "his power" comes from himself and not from God and just some sketchy people and she has been acting more and more like this person lately as well so we want her to be a part of Kailey's life which is why we are trying and also trying to keep my family from getting involved even though they want to protect us, but we will have her in kailey's life but will carefully monitor things and influences and potential sorry to say child molesters that they may or may not have over at her house. I just wish everyone would take a step back and try to have some understanding towards one another. Life is too short for all this stuff that has been going on between our families lately. Especially when planning this baby shower. Like Ryan said unfortunately it seems like it is for our families and not us but none the less I am grateful becuase they are just really all trying to make it special and are really overthinking it, we told them to just keep it simple but they are just sooo understandably excited which I am lucky for but at times it can be like "yikes" :) So needless to say I really enjoy the times with Ryan, my pups, and a quiet afternoon out in my backyard under the sun. :) lol 3.21.2012

Source: http://babyfit.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_journal_individual.asp?blog_id=345840

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